Inside Edition

Well, if Obama holds on and wins, I will be looking forward to returning to the States. However, now Poo has changed her mind and she doesn't want to go to America anymore.

Why not? The collapsing economy? the imminent Depression? dwindling opportunities? polarized politics? two unwinnable wars?

No! It's Inside Edition!

Yesterday, she told me, "Oh, Mick, I was watching Inside Edition, and they had a hidden camera on the food vendors in America. One guy, he was scratching his ass! Then the customers came and he made their hot dogs without washing his hands. Another guy said he always washes his hands, but when there were no customers he was picking his feet, and then the customers came and he made their lunch without washing his hands. Oooohhhh! I don't want to go to America!"

Then, today she told me, "Oh, Mick, I was watching Inside Edition, and they showed a woman who was attacked by a bear! She lives in Calfornia! I'm so scared of bears; I don't want to live in California. She was just working in the garden and the bear attacked her and bit her face. Then she poked her finger in the bear's eye and screamed and her dogs came and chased the bear away. What's wrong with dogs in America? Couldn't they smell the bear before it attacked?"

"They were probably in the house," I responded, "watching Inside Edition."