Mid-Strength and Vegemite

It's over. As they smugly predicted, the Aussies slaughtered my beloved Indians. As a true Indian, M-Rock wants to blame his own side: poor fielding, lazy running, bowlers who can't bat, and most of all, the damned corrupt BCCI and politicians interfering with cricket instead of supporting youth development, etc. All of that is true, but if you've seen them live, you know why the Aussies are world champs: they exhibited a professionalism, grit, and athleticism that completely outclassed their opponents.

Today was 40 degrees (that's 104 Fahrenheit) and the Aussies were completely unfazed: sprinting after every ball, diving left and right, bowling at 150 km/hr and screaming and appealing like mad.

The Indians, meanwhile, looked like Mexicans after lunch: siesta time! That's what normal people do when it's incredibly hot, but these Aussies aren't normal.

I am still stunned by the way the cops brutalized the fun-loving, water-throwing Melbourne youths at the MCG, "The People's Ground". I saw the cops assault and expel those cheerful, playful youths for 1) standing up in unison (initiating the mexican wave), 2) pushing beach balls into the air, 3) throwing water on each other, 4) stacking up beer cups, 5) wearing towels on their heads (racist behavior), and 6) one girl was expelled for showing her breasts!

To further suppress the Melbourne youths, they sell only half-strength beer. They call it "Mid" for "mid-strength"). It's totally worthless. It does nothing but make you pee. The youths, however, had a stack of about 70 empty cups which they swayed around like a wet noodle as they sang their chants (rhythmic tunes, such as: It IS Brett Lee! It IS Brett Lee!, etc.). But then the cops confiscated the cups.

Nobody knew what to make of me: the displaced and confused American, but most people were nice enough. The Aussie opinion of Americans has declined in recent years: from a 55% approval rating to 39%. So, you ask, what is it about America that they find objectionable: acting like the world's bully? bombing countries into the Stone Age? an illiterate, bumbling fool of a President? No, Aussies are OK with all that. They have two major objections:

2) the ruinous influence of American language on the Australian language: like totally!

1) (most importantly) the virulent influence of American food culture on Australian cuisine.

I don't really understand this idea: Australian cuisine. Surely, Fish & Chips isn't theirs, neither is pizza. They have Hungry Jacks, instead of Burger King: is that it?

I have two days left in OZ. Tomorrow I will try to take in Australian culture. I will spread Vegemite on toast, drink some Toohey's and contemplate: what, exactly, is Australian cuisine?